PRIOR TO MEETING WITH COACH TO DISCUSS A CONCERN
- Avoid conversations with a coach before or after a game regarding a personal matter or
- in-game decision making.
- Contact the coach using the designated method of communication (phone, e-mail, text, etc.).
- Communicate with the coach that you would like to schedule an in-person private
- meeting on a non-game day.
- Be upfront and clear as to the purpose of the meeting and request for a date and time as soon as possible.
- Spend quality time with your child discussing their feelings, concerns, frustrations, and
- matters of importance to them.
- Deeply reflect on your child’s words and thoughts. Make sure that you completely
- understand their point of view.
- Collect your thoughts on personal observations from the bleachers and sidelines.
- Be an advocate for your child’s wishes and best interests. Don’t be tempted by your
- personal agenda or feelings.
- Spend time creating your child’s narrative in a manner that makes sense.
- Practice for the meeting by running through your child’s narrative as well as various
- scenarios and responses.
- Establish reasonable goals for the meeting that properly reflect the best interests of your child.
DURING THE MEETING WITH A COACH TO DISCUSS A CONCERN
- Concerned, but not a confrontational tone.
- Kindly ask prior to the meeting if the coach would have any objection to note taking by
- the parents.
- Initiate a warm and constructive tone to the conversation.
- Thank the coach for their time and begin to outline the purpose of the meeting. Stick
- closely to your child’s narrative.
- Never reference another child or parent in the meeting. Stay completely focused on your child’s best interests!
- Avoid accusations, comparisons, hearsay, and rumors. Always stick to the facts!
- Once you have finished speaking, please allow the coach to respond without
interruption. Respect is a two-way street!
- Listen closely to what the coach has to say and use nonverbal cues in a positive manner.
Even though differences of opinion may develop over the course of the conversation,
always remain calm.
- Always avoid name calling, yelling, and profanities. They immediately escalate an already
- Ask the coach for their honest opinion and recommendations on how to improve the
- Ask the coach how you could be of an assistance in improving the current situation.
- Collaborate on the next steps going forward and maintain open lines of communication.
- No matter how pleasant or unpleasant the conversation, always leave on civil terms.
AFTER THE MEETING WITH THE PARENTS AND THE NEXT STEPS
- Send some form of thank you correspondence to the coach (e-mail, text, note, etc).
- Highlight the key points of the conversation as a reminder of the next steps.
- If necessary, set up another formal meeting for a progress report on the next steps.
- Establish informal check-ins at times convenient for all parties involved just to touch base.
- Carefully monitor your child’s progress and overall happiness.